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OK Cupid's questions...
blaisepascal
OKCupid (which I joined for the tests/memes/whatever, not for the dating) has a series of questions they ask you to get to know you better, so it can better suggest folks who might be good friends/fucks/whatever.

In filling out these questions (and there are hundreds, if not thousands of them. So far, after a couple of years on the site, I've answered less than 200), there are some pretty bizarre ones. I don't know how to answer them.

The most recent one, paraphrased, is something like "If you came home and found your partner incapacitated due to alcohol or drugs, with a note asking you to take advantage of the situation sexually, what would you do? (a) anything I wanted, (b) things he/she would like, or (c) nothing"

I find my though-process interesting. I want to know more: does it appear the note was written before he/she got drunk/high? How has our relationship been defined before this? Is this behavior out of character? In short, I feel that the level of intentional consent to what I do is important, including the fact that, being incapacitated prevents a withdrawal of consent. The last isn't necessarily conclusive: it's OK to play without a safeword, as long as its clear that all agree to it ahead of time. None of this information is available in the question.

I think, ultimately, I would do nothing if the "offer" came as a surprise. The question of consent would be too great. Besides, I strongly suspect that an incapacitated person won't have good reactions, and what's the point of having sex with someone if they don't react?

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I realize this is a weird place for me to comment but I have to say it. You're a good man. There is nothing knee-jerk about you. Your values are well reasoned and ethical. I'm proud of you.

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