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Unintended hurtfulness
blaisepascal
skitten just came home crying from a music jam a couple of hours before it's end. Apparently, the hostess of the jam asked her to move to a different seat outside the main circle "so the musicians can join the circle".

If you are unaware, skitten went to college at a high-ranked music school, competed for 13 years in a Barbershop chorus and quartet, attends as many jams as she can, but doesn't play nearly as much as she had since her stroke 3 years ago. Currently she plays hammered dulcimer and voice, as there aren't that many 1-handed instruments she can either afford or is willing to play.

She considers herself to be a musician, and to be asked to move to make room for "the musicians" really hurt.

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I think its time to break the shillelaghs out and crack some skulls

...and love and support. If you make music, you are a musician, period. What an incredibly insensitive thing to have said.

Re: Sending hugs...

thanks sweety :) haven't seen you in person in such a long time... wondering how that might happen...

I *am* a musician... a frustrated one at best right now, but I'm still a musician.. definately
often I find myself butting heads with laura's insensitive behaviors. Triuthfully she sometimes treats me like a person unworthy of notice. I should have known better than to go to her porch... but it's the only one that had the type ofmusic thart I'm interested in, debby saw my reaction & she checked in with me. so I guess she'll probably notice my facebook entry as no surprise....

That's really insensitive. Perhaps you or Kaaren (when/if she feels up to it) should point out to the hostess that that was hurtful and insensitive. She probably has no idea.

I very quickly wrote it on facebook & lots of ppl have responded but I'm not sure she's seen it

People. Suck.

One of my former roommates called me stupid, to my face. Actually, they said that I "couldn't handle learning how to play a card game," and they were therefore not going to teach me. I was so upset that I walked away from them and cried pretty much for the rest of my night (I didn't exactly have a great self image my freshman year of college). I never even got as much as an apology from any of them, and I later agreed to get an apartment with them off campus (like I said before, no self esteem).

All I can say is that you have to know that *you're* awesome and not let D-bags get to you. :( Hugs to Kaaren. I haven't heard many examples, but from what I've heard she's a great musician.

<333

~MF

*hugs* Sometimes people are just too wrapped up in themselves... or just don't recognize rudeness in themselves, or both. Talis has had to deal with some of that this year... it's very hard maintaining the sense of self when others are trying to drag you down. Fortunately, some of us think otherwise of Kaaren's talents. (Will we see you guys for the Cider Party this year?)

I think not. We're going to an event on Columbus Day Weekend and I am not fiscally prepared to trek to Boston the following weekend. Since Oct16 is Payday and we have no pressing financial woes at this time that won't be cleared up by then, I suppose we could go, but I'd have to ask for Friday off in a week that I'm already taking Monday and Tuesday off. Of course, I do have an excess of unused vacation time....

All told... probably not.

what an insensitive bitch! i'll bet she wouldn't recognize a "real" musician if s/he bit her on the ass.

*hugs*, especially for Skitten...



thank you sweet aunty o-mine *hugs* Laura really has no idea that she's so insensitive... Insensitive people rarely do...

I say we all grab kazoos and jews harp and attend the next jam and rock out on "Freebird"

ummm Bu looked at your profile & you apparently went to college when & where I went to high achool *boggles*

(Deleted comment)
That is just so incredibly rude and insensitive.

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